Purrfect Surprise

 


Pss... Pss.. *I feel a paw on my face*

“Hello Human”, comes the voice beyond the paw. I open my eyes to see it is my cat talking to me. My eyes widen and I am unable to believe myself, I shut my eyes again thinking that I might be dreaming. *I feel my cat’s nose around my ear* “Hey, Wake Up, Please” he says again. I realize that it's not a dream, it is real that my tuxedo-colored cat is talking to me.
I somehow try to calm my racing heart and try to get hold of the situation. My head is still trying to figure out if it is me who can understand the cat language or if my cat is really speaking to me. 


On the other hand, I see my cat scowling at me with his adorable yellow eyes, he starts speaking again, “Now, this is what I hate about you. You are always late. You never wake up on time, you never give me food on time, I have to wake you up every time that I am hungry, why can’t you be responsible just for once?”


I check my watch to see that it is 3 AM. I feel infuriated and take advantage of the fact that he can now understand me. I try to justify myself, “As much as I love you, this is not the time for you to be eating? And this is absolutely not late. It is too early to wake up.” “Says who? I like to be up and eating my breakfast by this time.”, says the cat. “And now that you are awake why don’t you fill my bowl with some food? Do you have any idea how busy I will be for the rest of the day?” 


I obey my overlord just like a good cat-parent and fill his bowl with his favorite cat food. Knowing that my cat can now talk, I try to inquire more about his random behavior. I ask him what is keeping him busy today? He says:


“You think you know about cats but did you know that we are nocturnal? So this is my daytime. After my breakfast, I am going to try and find that mouse you suspect hiding in the attic. I know that thought doesn’t let you sleep. While we are talking about it, when you hear a noise I hear it too, so you don’t have to ask me like a baby ‘What was that?’ I probably know where that comes from too. I am a cat, not a dog, I don’t need your validation for the fact that I am a good boy. Well, I am. I don’t like when you cuddle too. If I show you my belly, rub it only twice, more than that annoys me and you can tell by those scratches on your hand what happens after that.”


“I don’t want you to protect me every time you see a dog, I am not scared of dogs, I just don't like fighting with canines and hence I take care of it by sliding under the chair. Speaking about what scares me will you please ask the gardener to no longer use his machine, it makes horrible noises and it kills my vibe. I don't like it when you try to groom me as well but you do a good job at removing ticks out of my soft fur.", he adds.


I wonder whether he really likes me or does he feels stuck with me as he didn't have a choice? He sees the confused look on my face and says, "Oh stop thinking and spill it out?" and I pop my question to which he answers, "Don't you worry, I chose you as my human before you chose me. Why do you think I bump my head into you every morning? That is a cat's way of showing affection. Why do I play with the strings that you get me? I don't understand the swirling but you enjoy when I jump around. I purr happily when you give me those massages. Following you around is a part of my busy schedule."


My eyes got teary as I have always considered him as my child. All of a sudden I felt as if wet sandpaper was being rubbed on my head. As I touched my forehead I realized that I was still in bed and it was indeed a dream and there was my little cat licking my forehead at 3 AM, asking me to feed him.

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